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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29976270">sealed shut yet never so open.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunednf/pseuds/lunednf'>lunednf</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Best Friends, Drabble, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining, Unrequited Love, lapslock</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 16:47:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>657</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29976270</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunednf/pseuds/lunednf</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“it’s been months. do i really mean so little to you?”</p>
<p>-</p>
<p>dream can never not think about george, especially when he left so abruptly. without any warning.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>sealed shut yet never so open.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hello !! this is my first dnf oneshot on here. if either dream or george are ever uncomfortable with any of my fics i will delete them immediately but until then, i hope you enjoy.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>i made the horrible realization that i love that song so much because he sounds like you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>it’s pathetic isn’t it?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i listen to his voice because it’s so alike yours. it brings me home. you’re my home. and by god am i homesick.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>did i do something wrong? there’s no punishment worse than knowing you’re out there and still not talking to me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i see you commenting on posts, why can’t you at least tell me to fuck off?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>maybe then i’d understand that i cannot depend on you for happiness. but how can i not when you’re my favorite person in the world? how can i not when it’s all i’ve known for so long?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i’ve had you for so long that i’ve forgotten what life is like without you. maybe you’re just trying to remind me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i can’t get over how much he sounds like you. it’s the reason i keep his songs on repeat. the things i do to keep your voice alive in my head. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>it’s been months. do i really mean so little to you?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i understand if it’s for your mental health, but it’s deteriorating mine. i just want to talk to you again. i miss you. </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>there was a pause. he lifted his pen and leaned back in his chair, cringing at how he had been slouching. he sighed when he realized that his hand was tinted black at the side, seeing how smudged the ink had been getting. dream went back to writing.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>you know, i had a dream about you last night.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>it was more of a nightmare.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i dreamed that i lost you. not in like a dying way, but it was scary. i don’t ever want to lose you. i wonder how you’re doing, but i don’t want to overstep and make you feel pressured to respond. i just hope you’re okay. i just wish you knew how much i love you. so much. i  think about you constantly. sometimes you’re the only thing on my mind.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>it isn’t even romantic anymore, i don’t think. i don’t know. it’s kinda hard to tell. hard to distinguish between platonic and romantic since to me it’s always been both when it comes to you. i just miss you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>i hope you miss me too.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he sighed once more, putting down the pen next to the paper he had been writing on. he hadn’t even noticed that he was crying until he looked at the tears sticking the paper to the desk, smudging the ink further.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>you’re so pathetic</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he thought to himself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>you probably haven’t even crossed his mind once in these past months. </span>
  </em>
  <span>his own mind was his worst enemy, yet he couldn’t help but believe it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>silently, he folded the letter and stuck it into a plain red envelope, sealing it shut with a white wax seal. dream got up from his chair and stretched, many bones cracking at once. he looked over at the clock, 4:04 am. another sleepless night, another night with his brain filled to the brim with george thoughts. the way he would giggle at every joke dream made, no matter how stupid. </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re such an idiot</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he’d say. his fond smile whenever they were on facetime and dream rambled on about anything, not caring what he was saying as long as he got to hear his voice for a while longer. </span>
  <em>
    <span>his smile.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>he grabbed the envelope, walked over to the fireplace in his office and threw it into the roaring fire, his heart cracking each time the fire did. dream felt at ease. </span>
  <em>
    <span>coward.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“shut up,” he whispered to himself.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>his thoughts were out of his brain, on paper, but they would never leave his mouth. never leave the room he was currently standing in the middle of, eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep and lack of him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>then, there was a soft, hurried knock at the door.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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